3/28/05

Lesson 1
Exercise #1
	
	Firstly, I encountered difficult feeling comfortable
and finding the breath. After the breath was found, for about
20 minutes of the sitting, the mind felt very lethargic and
I considered on several occassions that I might lay down. These
two problems might be related to the fact that I have not
meditated in awhile, and when I have it has been while laying down,
just before sleeping. In this way, I would say that I was experiencing
"just hanging my fork in the air," and struggling to find the energy
to grip in more firmly.

	On occassion I felt a clear, solid connection with the present
breath. The coolness and lucidity is quite a nice feeling. The sukkha
that arises after meditation is quite nice too, if only lasting a few
brief minutes before the mind becomes dull and agitated again.

	The balancing metaphor is very true and poingnant. It can be a
motivator factor or it can be a detractor.

Exercise #2
The predominant sensations around the nose are coolness and itching or a 
fuzzy sensation. There was a time when I felt a dull ache or a "blockage"
at the bridge of my nose while meditating. I did not notice it during this
sitting. The movement of the abdomen consisted of gentle stretching, in and
out, and at times the mind would feel the need to take deeper breaths to
make the stretch deeper. 


Exercise #3
It is a very freeing, "relief" sort of feeling. The body feels lighter for
a moment, lighter and relaxed, after the inhalation and then the exhalation.
If one focuses on the out breath "first," one can notice that the next
inhalation will be almost automatic as well. There really is no first and last
breath and neither exhalation or inhalation is non-automatic. There is no need
to control either breath that is. Without the "focusing" of awareness at a 
particular spot like the nostril or abdomen, the awareness is perceptibly
flat, but this does not seem to effect the breathing. As stated, it is automatic.

Exercise #4
Bringing awareness to the beginning or end of the breath seems to make it easier
to stay with the breath. The attention becomes sharper because there is a technique
for sharpening. Otherwise, it's easy for the mind to get lost in the flow of the
breath or thoughts. It serves as a temporary anchor, reference point, or reminder.
Awareness feels more clear and cooler

Exercise #5
It is very hard for me to do this exercise. After reading the question and attempting
the exercise my mind naturally feels the sensations. It is difficult to just 
observe the arm visually after reading the exercise, without feeling the movement
as well. 

But I have spontaneously and not so spontaneously experienced the difference 
before. Having a memory of an event as opposed to experiencing the event right now, is 
similar to visually observing the arm moving as opposed to feeling it move. That is the
memory might have aspects of the reality of the experience, but does not necessarily
have all of those aspects. And similarly, when observing the arm visually I might feel
certain sensations of movement, but in all likelihood not notice or perceive completely
the sensations of movement. "Feeling" in the mindfulness sense, might be more-so devoid
of inaccurate perceptions of the reality of experience than observation. And at the same
time, it is IN those perceptions. You are experiencing the perceptions; not removed from
them, the perceptions which make up your experience.

Exercise #6
The easiest technique I've found is to focus on the touch points between the butt and
the cushion or chair. Sometimes a little rocking or slight movement will more easily
help one become aware of these touch points. Additionally and recently with the constant
pain in my shoulders, there is always some sort of sensation that one can use as an
anchor during the pause between breaths.

Exercise #7
This is much easier said then done sometimes. But when done it is a wonderful feeling.
Sometimes I find myself judging how fast I let certain thoughts go then other, and then
start thinking that I should not let certain thoughts go, that I should give them
equal attention. And then I just let it all go. Always beginning again, I agree
is a simple, effective attitude. What a wonderful practice! Maybe this attitude will
carry into real life ;} This is a like a "never quit" kind of attitude. But don't
get to lost looking at the trees, in spite of the forest.